Baby Mine
by EOLuvFrv
Summary: "Baby mine, don't you cry. Baby mine, dry your eyes. Rest your head close to my heart, never to part, baby of mine." From Baby Mine by Bette Midler. Olivia's ecstatic; she's finally becoming a mother! But can she cope when she receives bad news & the harsh reality of her situation crashes down on her? Can Elliot make her believe that his love for her & her baby is genuine & real?
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer: I own no one! SVU and all recognizable characters belong to Dick Wolf.**_

_**A/N: Many thanks to both of my betas! And an extra thanks to Sam for being my sounding board for this idea and helping me come up with a different yet believable plot! **_

_**I know that the "Liv gets pregnant and her significant other leaves her" storyline has been done a lot. But I've added another twist to it, so maybe this one won't be like all the others. Hopefully this one will be somewhat different and a fresh take on an old storyline! Please leave me a review and let me know what you think!**_

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Chapter One

"That better be decaf," Detective Elliot Stabler teased with a smile as he approached his desk and plopped down into his chair.

His partner, Detective Olivia Benson, greeted him with a raised eyebrow as she sipped from a steaming coffee cup. "Good morning to you too," she said as she sat her cup down on her desk.

"Decaf?" he asked, pressing the issue as he raised his own eyebrow in response.

"Yours," she nodded toward the cup of coffee that she had placed on the desk facing hers, only moments before. "No." Then motioning to her own cup, she sighed. "Mine, yes."

"Good," he winked before retrieving the cup from his desk and taking a sip. Then he nodded toward the cup in his hand. "Thanks."

"You think Dean would actually let me buy a caffeinated beverage for myself right now?" she smirked.

Elliot glanced down at his cup, quickly verifying that it did, in fact, host the logo of their favorite coffee shop. He looked over at his partner with a frown. "Porter went to the coffee shop with you?"

Olivia looked down at the cup she held between both of her hands. "El," she sighed. "I know you don't like him."

"Don't like him," Elliot snorted. "That's an understatement."

"El," she sighed again. "I love him… he's my fiancée."

"He's not good enough for you, Liv. You deserve better."

"And," she continued as if she didn't hear his comment. "He's my baby's father," she rested one hand over her barely there baby bump.

Elliot opened his mouth to say something but changed his mind and sighed instead.

"I know you're just trying to look out for me," she looked up at her partner with tears in her eyes. "But you're my best friend and I need your support and encouragement right now. It breaks my heart to see my best friend and my fiancée always at each other's throats."

He looked across their desks and his smart aleck comeback died in his throat when he saw her tears. "Liv… I'm sorry," he rubbed his face with both hands before continuing. "Porter just… I've never liked the guy."

"I know," she answered quietly. "Will you just _**TRY **_to get along with him? Please?"

"Alright," he agreed.

"Thank you."

"But I'm not making any promises."

"I wouldn't expect any less from you," she grinned as she wiped away her tears.

"So, why was Porter at the coffee shop with you?"

"We were on our way to work," she replied as she turned her attention to a case file on her desk.

"Together," Elliot paused skeptically. "You don't usually ride in together."

"I have an appointment today. He wants to go with me, so we thought it would be easier to just take one car."

"A doctor's appointment?"

"Umm hmm," she mumbled, her attention still on the case file.

"Didn't you just have one the other day?"

"Umm hmm," she mumbled again.

"Olivia," Elliot called with a slight harsh edge to his voice, needing to get her full attention.

She looked up in surprise at the sound of his voice.

"Didn't you just have a doctor's appointment the other day?"

"Yeah."

"Then why are you going back again so soon. Is everything ok?" he frowned.

"Yeah," she waved his concern away with a dismissive wave of her hand. "Just getting test results."

"Test? What kind of test?" the concern remained in his voice.

"CVS test."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"El… don't worry. My doctor said it's just a routine test because of my age."

"You're not old."

"No, but I'm in the category of advanced maternal age because I'm over 35. She said she doesn't think there's anything to be worried about but she had rather err on the side of caution."

Elliot nodded, the concern he felt only moments before, melted away as he took in the information. Knowing that the doctor wasn't worried eased the tension and he visibly relaxed. "So that's why Porter wants to go with you."

Olivia smiled as she remembered the conversations she had with her fiancée. "He wants to go to all of my appointments. He's just as excited as I am about this baby."

"You're gonna make a wonderful mother."

"I hope so."

"You will," Elliot spoke confidently. "I've seen how amazing you are with children for years."

"That's different," she shook her head. "Child victims and the children of victims are different."

"You're good with them too… but I was talking about my kids. You've always been wonderful with them."

"You have great kids. They're easy to be good to," Olivia smiled as she picked up her cup of coffee again.

His smile grew at his best friend's comment. "They think you hung the moon."

Olivia laughed. "I dunno about that."

"They do," Elliot sobered as he continued. "When Kathy and I were going through the divorce, you were the only one that my kids would talk to about it, they wouldn't even talk to me."

Olivia smiled sadly at her best friend. "Sometimes it's easier to talk to someone who's not your parents."

He shook his head, to clear the sad thoughts away. "Anyway, my point is that you are absolutely amazing with children and you're going to be the best mother."

"Thanks," she swallowed back tears that threatened to spill down her face. "I needed to hear that."

"No thanks necessary. That's what I'm here for," Elliot grinned comically.

Olivia laughed and threw her pen at him, "Get to work, I wanna be done with this paper work before Dean picks me up for my appointment."

~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~

Much later that evening, Elliot and Fin walked back into the squad room after spending hours dealing with four back to back calls. They made their way back to their desks, both glad to be back in the squad room.

Elliot dropped down into his chair then looked up and found the desk facing his, empty. It was obvious with one glance that his partner had not been back yet, her desk was still clear from where she cleaned it off earlier before her doctor's appointment. He frowned and looked around before turning his gaze to Munch. "Liv hasn't come back?"

"No, not yet," the older detective answered. "She probably had to wait awhile. You know how doctors' offices can be."

"Yeah," he replied, a frown of worry still on his face as he glanced at his watch. "But it's after 6, most offices close at 5."

"Maybe hers' doesn't," Munch replied calmly. "Or maybe she was tired and just went home after her appointment."

"She would have called if she was too tired to come back," Elliot pulled his cell phone from his belt and hit the first speed dial button. His brow furrowed even more as his call went straight to Olivia's voicemail. He snapped his phone shut then stood and started toward the Captain's office. He quickly crossed the squad room, stopping only to knock briefly on the open door.

"Elliot?" Cragen asked as he looked up from the work on his desk. "Something wrong?" he asked when he saw the look on his detective's face.

"Has Liv called?" Elliot asked bluntly, with no preamble.

"No. Why?"

"She should've been back by now."

Cragen frowned as he looked up at the clock on the wall. "I didn't realize it was this late."

"It's not like Liv to not come back and not call."

"I know."

"Cap… I've gotta - - " Elliot started but was quickly cut off by the Captain.

"Go," Cragen nodded. "Keep me in the loop."

Elliot responded with a nod of his own before turning and hurrying out of the squad room.

Ten minutes later, Elliot pulled up in front of Olivia's apartment building. He jumped out of the car and hurried into the building, choosing to take the stairs up to Olivia's floor rather than waiting on the elevator. He ran down the hall with his cell phone held to his ear. He skidded to a stop in front of her door as his call went straight to voicemail for the fifth time. He shoved his phone into his pocket and knocked on Olivia's apartment door. "Liv?" he called through the door.

He was greeted by nothing but silence.

He called again, louder this time as he knocked on the door harder, "Liv?"

Again, silence was his only answer.

"Liv!" called more urgently as he now pounded on her apartment door. "Olivia!"

More silence.

He paused for a moment before calling to her again. "Do I need to use the key you gave me? Cause I will if you don't open the door!"

And yet again, his only answer was complete silence.

He fumbled with his key ring, taking only a couple of seconds to locate the key that Olivia had given him early in their partnership, over a decade ago. He had never used it before, it was only for emergencies. But this was an emergency, he assured himself as he slid the key into the doorknob. "Liv… I'm coming in," he called as he turned the key, unlocking the door.

He pushed the door open and stepped inside her apartment, calling for her once again. "Olivia…"

The answering silence and stillness was deafening.

Elliot crossed the apartment, approaching the door that he knew led to her bedroom. "It's just me…" he called, giving her ample time to answer or to stop him before he slowly opened the door. He frowned when he found both the bedroom and bathroom empty. He moved to the bedroom closet and looked inside. He looked up on the closet shelf, where he knew she kept a suitcase. Then ran both hands up his face, over his head and through his hair; he sighed heavily and pulled his phone out of his pocket. He flipped it open and hit another speed dial number.

It only rang once before the person on the other end picked up. "Elliot?"

"She's gone, Cap."

"What?"

"She's gone," Elliot's voice cracked as he repeated his statement.

"What do you mean gone?" Cragen asked in shock.

"I mean gone. Her apartment is empty, there's very few clothes left in her closet and her suitcase is gone."

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_**A/N 2: Uh oh! Liv's gone? Where did she go? And why? Where's Porter? **_

_**Anyone curious? Tell me! Please review!**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Re-uploading to correct a HUGE mistake I didn't catch before posting the first time! Thank you for drawing my attention to it, ToriRenee161! I really appreciate the heads up! :~D**_

_**Disclaimer: Alas, I own no one. All recognizable characters belong to Dick Wolf.**_

_**A/N: To my wonderful betas, I can't thank you enough! Your patience is unlimited and your editing is nothing short of amazing! **_

_**To the readers, many thanks for the encouraging reviews! They make writing even more enjoyable and rewarding! I hope you like this chapter. Please leave a review and tell me what you think!**_

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**Chapter Two**

"Did you find anything?" Elliot asked as he rushed back into the Captain's office of the 16th precinct a few minutes after finding Olivia's apartment empty.

"Not yet," Captain Cragen answered as he dropped his desk phone back into its' cradle. "Fin is dumping her phone right now."

"This isn't like her, Cap," Elliot shook his head. "She never just disappears with no word to anyone."

"Are you thinking foul play?"

"Yes…" he hesitated. "No… I don't know. I don't think so, not right now at least. Her clothes and suitcase wouldn't be gone if it was foul play."

"Trust your gut, it's almost always your best lead."

"Liv's last call was to Porter at 11:47 this morning," Fin said as he joined the men in Cragen's office.

"Right before he picked her up for her doctor's appointment," Elliot sighed.

"Have you talked to Dean?" Cragen asked, turning his attention back to Elliot.

"I called him twice on the way back from Liv's apartment. He didn't answer."

"Try again."

Elliot nodded as he quickly dialed then raised his cell phone to his ear.

"Want me to keep digging, Cap?"

"See if you can locate Por- -" Cragen started but stopped short as his attention was drawn outside his office door.

Fin turned and followed the Captain's gaze into the squad room. "Incoming…" Fin muttered as he tapped his colleague's shoulder.

Elliot turned to look before hitting a button on his cell phone and shoving it in his pocket. "Porter!" he yelled as he stormed out of Cragen's office toward the newcomer. "Ever heard of answering your phone?"

"I…" the FBI agent stared at his cell phone in his hand for a moment. "Sorry," he said quietly, almost apologetically as he slipped his phone back into his pants pocket.

"Where's Liv?" Elliot asked anxiously.

"What do you mean?" Dean frowned. "I came to talk to her. I thought she would be here."

"Didn't you go to the doctor with her?"

"Well, yes. But…"

"But what?" Elliot pressed as Fin and Cragen stepped up behind him.

"I dropped her off here afterwards."

"Here?" Cragen frowned. "She never came back inside."

"I guess she called a cab and went home," Dean shrugged.

"Guess again," Elliot's voice was harsh. "I just came from her apartment. Her clothes and suitcase are gone."

"I haven't talked to her since I dropped her off. I don't know where she went or where she is."

"How can you not know? She's your fiancée! And the mother of your child! You, of all people, should know where she is!" Elliot growled as he moved closer, invading Dean's personal space.

"Look, I said I'm sorry alright?" Dean stepped back as his voice took on an almost childish tone.

"No, it's not alright!" Elliot yelled as he advanced on the FBI agent again. "Something had to have happened to really upset her. She never runs off like this without telling someone where she's going!"

"She had been crying earlier but she stopped and was ok by the time I dropped her off," Porter defended.

"Apparently she wasn't ok! She would be here if she was ok!" Elliot practically growled.

Fin reached over, catching Elliot by his shoulders and pulled him back away from Dean. "He's not worth it, El. Put your energy into finding Liv."

"Well she ran away without telling anyone so obviously she doesn't want to be found," Porter sneered, causing Elliot to lunge for him.

He struggled against his friend's hold, trying to break free; but Fin maintain a tight grip on Elliot's shoulders. "Let it go," Fin spoke calmly. "Let it go, man. Beating the creep up won't help us find Liv."

"Get out of my squad room," Cragen's voice was low, on the borderline of threatening.

"You heard the Captain," Fin narrowed his eyes when Dean refused to move. "Get out before I let go of Stabler. He'll put your head through the wall and you know it."

"Fine," Dean said with a roll of his eyes and an arrogant huff. "Let her know that I was looking for her when you find her," he called over his shoulder as he turned on his heel and walked out.

"Not on your life," Elliot glared at the man's back then pulled out of Fin's grip. He turned to look at Cragen. "Something went down between him and Liv."

Cragen and Fin both nodded in agreement.

"I'll run her financials and see if anything pops," Munch spoke up from where he sat watching the whole exchange between his colleagues and the defense FBI agent.

"Thanks, John," Elliot sighed before running both hands through his hair in frustration. "I have to find her. I don't know what happened; but whatever it was, it wasn't good."

"I don't think she would have gone very far," Cragen said as he rubbed the top of his head. "Not since this is her first pregnancy. I don't think she would want to be very far away from her doctor."

Elliot nodded. "True. She's being extra cautious like almost all first time mothers are."

"You're closer to her than anyone," Fin turned to Elliot. "Do you have any ideas where she could have gone?"

"I know a few of her favorite places; but if she's really trying to hide, she won't be at any of them. She'll go someplace where we wouldn't think of looking."

"Go check those places," Munch advised. "It's a start. At least until I finish running her financials."

Cragen nodded. "Go. I'll call you when we get the results."

"I'll help Stabler," Fin stated matter-of-factly as he turned and followed his co-worker.

Elliot glanced at Fin then leaned over his desk and scribbled on a piece of paper. "We'll cover more ground if we split up. You check these places," he handed the paper to Fin. "And I'll check her other favorite places."

Fin nodded as he took the short list from him and looked it over. The two men then walked briskly out of the squad room side by side.

~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~

"Pack it in, Elliot. We'll start fresh first thing in the morning," Captain Cragen spoke into his office phone, hours later.

"I can't, Cap. I can't stop until I find her," Elliot replied. "I have a really bad feeling… like something major is going on."

"You've done all you can for tonight. It's after midnight."

"I just talked to a clerk at the bodega next to the ATM where Liv last used her debit card."

"Did he give you anything?" Cragen asked.

"He remembered seeing her just before dark," Elliot answered.

"That all?"

"He said she seemed really upset and that when she left, she headed north."

"Upper Manhattan? The Bronx maybe?"

"I'm not sure. But the clerk saw her get into a black 4 door sedan… a Chevy Impala maybe."

"Impala," Cragen said thoughtfully. "A rental?"

"Probably," Elliot agreed. "He didn't see the whole license plate, just that it started with J Y."

"I'll get Fin to run it as a partial."

"Fin's still there?"

"Of course. So is Munch."

There was a moment of silence before Cragen continued. "Liv's family… to all of us. None of us are leaving until we find her. Fin and Munch are crashing in the cribs and I pulled out my old roll away cot from my office closet."

Elliot swallowed back a wave of tears as he cleared his throat to keep his voice from cracking when he spoke. "Cap…"

"You don't have to say it," Cragen interjected, having mercy on the Detective. "We understand. She's family. I'm not going to make it an official order, at least not right now. But I do wish you'd come back and catch a couple of hours in the cribs."

Despite his best efforts, Elliot's voice cracked when he finally spoke again. "I can't sleep now. Not while Liv's out there somewhere, clearly upset… upset enough to disappear without a word to anyone."

"Alright," the Captain relented. "But keep me updated."

"I will," he replied. He started to hang up but paused instead. "Tighten the screws on Porter. He knows more than he's saying."

"I'll see what we can do," Cragen promised. "And we'll call with any leads we get."

"Thanks, Cap," Elliot said, the gratitude obvious in his voice. They hung up and Elliot clipped his cell phone back onto his belt. He sighed and rubbed his face with both hands then reached forward and turned the key in the ignition of the car. He gripped the steering wheel with both hands and closed his eyes momentarily. "Please God…" he whispered a quick prayer.

~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~

A little while later, after several more hours of searching for his partner; Elliot entered the city limits of Albany, in the very early hours of the morning as he followed her proverbial trail of bread crumbs.

He pulled over to the side of the road and picked his cell phone up from the passenger seat. He quickly went to his text messages and opened the list of nearby hotels that Fin had sent him a few minutes before.

He sent a quick reply to Fin, knowing that his friend would pass the information onto their Captain and Munch. Then with a sigh, he pulled back onto the road and headed toward the first hotel on the list.

Another hour passed as Elliot moved from hotel to hotel, his hope fading a little each time he came up empty. He returned to his car after checking the last hotel on Fin's list. His phone chirped from his pocket just as he closed the car door. He pulled his phone out, hoping against hope that Olivia had decided to contact him.

"Captain," he muttered quietly to himself as he opened the new text message. _"Any luck?"_ he read.

He sighed then typed a reply. _"No. Just checked the last hotel that Fin sent. No sign of Liv, but the girl at the desk told me about a couple of small locally owned hotels. I'm gonna check them before continuing north."_

Cragen's reply text came quickly. _"Let us know what happens."_

It only took a few minutes for Elliot to find the first hotel. A quick look around the parking lot told him that, most likely, Olivia was not there. But he went inside just to make sure.

After yet another negative result, Elliot drove up the road to the next hotel. He glanced around as he parked the car; his eyes landed on a car matching the vague description that he got from the clerk at the bodega. His stomach clutched and he swallowed hard.

With renewed hope, he jumped out of the car and rushed into the small lobby. "Excuse me," he hurried over and spoke to the girl behind the counter. "Has an Olivia Benson checked in here?"

The girl looked up from the book she was reading and leaned over to get a closer look at the badge that Elliot held out. "Olivia Benson?"

"Yes, Detective Olivia Benson."

She reached over and hit a few buttons on the keyboard of the computer, then scanned the list of guests. "No sir, no Olivia Benson here."

Elliot sighed, then pulled out a picture of Olivia. "What about this woman? Have you seen her?"

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_**A/N 2:**_ _**Humm… has Elliot found Olivia? Is she there? If so, why is she hiding? If not, then where IS she? And what about Dean? What part does he play in all of this?**_

_**Anyone curious? Want answers? Leave me a review and let me know!**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Disclaimer: Me no own. You no sue! SVU and all recognizable characters belong to Dick Wolf.**_

_**A/N: Many, many thanks to my awesome betas! I am so blessed to call you ladies my friends!**_

_**To the readers… thank you so much for the reviews, favorites and follows! It is so much easier to write when I receive feedback. I love hearing what you think of each chapter! So, please review!**_

_**Also, I'm looking for a new beta to join my two amazing betas. I need someone who can focus on grammar. If you're interested, send me a message!**_

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**Chapter Three**

Elliot griped the key that the desk clerk had given him as he approached the room. His heart was racing with anticipation and hope that it was indeed Olivia in the room. He was so relieved when the girl behind the desk recognized Olivia's picture and was reasonably sure she was the woman in room 102.

Walking across the parking lot, Elliot stopped beside the car that matched the vague description that the clerk at the bodega had given him. He looked in the driver's window, hoping to see Olivia's badge or gun or anything that would let him know it was her. He sighed when he found nothing after looking in the other three windows as well.

He quickly moved through the early morning semi-darkness to the door of room 102. He drew in a deep breath and slowly let it out before raising his hand and knocking lightly. A few seconds passed and there was no movement from inside the room. He knocked a little louder. As before, there was no answer and no movement in the room. He knocked a third time, again a little louder than before. Yet again, there was no answer.

His heart began to beat harder as his thoughts turned to all kinda of horrible possibilities. No longer caring if he disturbed the guests in the neighboring rooms, he knocked a fourth time, not even trying to be quiet. He bit his bottom lip, deciding that if she didn't answer this time, he would use the key the desk clerk gave him.

"Alright, alright," a soft voice called from the other side of the door. Only a couple of seconds passed before he heard movement at the door as if the room's occupant was looking through the peephole and then the sound of the deadbolt unlocking. The door opened and he nearly collapsed with relief.

"Elliot! What are you doing here? How did you find me?" Olivia asked softly, a frown marring her face.

He quickly blinked back tears, refusing to let them fall. He reached out and pulled Olivia into his arms. He hugged her close for a moment before slowly pulling back, looking at her closely.

Olivia reached out and took his arm, pulling him into the room. "What are you doing here?" she asked again as she closed and locked the door behind him.

"What am I doing here?" Elliot asked with a frown of concern. "What are _**you**_ doing here?"

"El…" the tone of her voice was unmistakable. He wasn't going to get any answers until he gave some of his own answers.

"I've been looking for you for hours," he sighed as she crossed the room and flipped on one of the dim bedside lamps.

"Why?" she asked, her voice flat and heavy.

"Why?" he asked in astonishment. "Because you left without saying a word to anyone, Liv." He took a couple of steps closer to her and finally got a good look at her face. "Liv…" the worry was even more evident in his voice now.

Her eyes were blood-shot, there were bags and dark circles under her eyes. Clearly, she had been crying and had not been sleeping. The happy glow, that had been present from the day she found out she was pregnant, was now absent from her face. Her shoulders sagged in defeat and she toyed nervously with several balled up tissues in her fist.

"Liv…" he called her again as he took a step toward her. "Liv, talk to me. What's wrong?"

She shook her head. "Nothing. I'm fine."

"I know better than that."

"You should go."

"No, I shouldn't," he replied. "Something is obviously wrong. You're in a hotel room several hours from home. Your eyes tell me that you've been crying and not sleeping."

"El… don't."

"Don't what? Care?" he moved toward her again. "You're my partner, Liv. And my best friend. I'll always care."

"I… I can't… I can't do this right now," tears filled her eyes and her voice shook as she shook her head again.

"Can't do what?" he asked kindly.

"This," she motioned between herself and him with one hand. "I can't do this," she tossed the used tissues away a grabbed several clean ones from the box sitting on the bedside table. She quickly wiped away the tears from her eyes before they could fall down her face.

"You don't have to do anything," his voice was soft and caring. He didn't know why tears were suddenly filling his eyes. All he knew was that Olivia was upset and that was enough to upset him as well. "Let me in, Liv," he practically begged. "Just let me in."

"I already did," she motioned to the door.

"You know that's not what I meant."

She sighed and turned her back to Elliot.

"Liv… please," he spoke quietly, pleadingly as he walked up behind her. He reached out and gently laid his hand on her shoulder.

"El…" her voice shook as she struggled to hold back a fresh wave of tears.

"I'm right here," he answered as he gently turned her around to face him.

"I can't… I just can't," she closed her eyes for a brief moment and he could hear the heartbreak in her voice.

"Yes you can," he pulled her into a hug. "It took me hours to find you. I'm not going anywhere." He held her close as she broke down in sobs. "Did the doctor tell you something about the baby? Is that what's wrong? You can tell me."

"I… I'm sorry," he could barely hear her through her tears. "I just had to get away. I couldn't handle it."

"Handle what, Sweetheart?" he asked kindly as he placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. "Tell me, I'll help you handle it."

Olivia slowly pulled away and walked across the room.

He opened his mouth to speak but stopped when he realized she was looking for something.

She dug through her duffle bag for a moment before pulling out a folded piece of paper. She turned back and walked back to him, tears streaming down her face. She stopped in front of him and hesitated only a moment before handing the paper to him. She stepped back again and sat down on the edge of the bed.

Elliot unfolded the paper without taking his eyes off of her.

She looked down, unable to look at him as he read the paper.

He finally tore his eyes away from Olivia and turned his attention to the paper in his hands. He read it over three times to make sure he was reading it right, then sighed sadly. He refolded the paper before walking over to the bed. He knelt down on the floor in front of Olivia and placed the paper on the bed. He reached up, laying one hand on her knee and his other hand on the back of her head. "I'm so sorry, Liv," he whispered softly.

Olivia slowly raised up and looked at Elliot.

Tears filled his own eyes as he gently wiped her tears away.

"I don't know how to do this," her voice broke as even more tears rolled down her cheeks. "I can't do this alone."

"It's ok," he tried to soothe her. "You can learn, we can learn. There are people who know and can teach us. You're not alone in this."

"Yes, I am!" she insisted. "Dean doesn't want to, as he says, 'deal with this'. He's going to leave me."

"Dean's a jerk."

"That's putting it mildly."

"You can do this if you want to. But I'll stand by you, no matter what decision you make. And so will Casey and Melinda and Fin and everyone else," he reassured her. He slowly stood from where he had been kneeling and sat down on the bed next to her. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, finally noticing the absence of her engagement ring. "Don't worry about Porter. He's an idiot and he doesn't deserve you anyways."

Olivia, still crying, leaned over and laid her head on Elliot's shoulder.

"You're not alone," he repeated. "I swear, you're not alone. I'm here, I'm with you every step of the way."

"Kathy and your kids need you."

"Honey," he sighed. "Kathy and I have been divorced for almost four years."

"But your kids…"

"My kids have me."

"But…"

"No buts. There's nothing to stop me from helping you."

"I don't want you to feel like you have to help me. I… I'll figure something out," she spoke quietly.

"Liv…" Elliot slowly pulled away, making her raise her head from his shoulder. He turned to face her, reached over and gently raised her face to look in her eyes. "I want to. I'd do anything for you."

"You don't have to," she repeated as she looked down.

"Hey, Liv. Look at me," he turned her face back to him. "I _**want**_ to. I want to help you," he smiled softly. "Don't you know that I love you?"

"I love you, too. You're my best friend."

"Yes, but that's not what I meant," he leaned a little closer. "Sweetheart, I'm _**in**_ love with you," he whispered just before leaning in and capturing her lips with his own for the first time.

* * *

_**A/N 2: Whew! So glad El found Liv! But obviously something's wrong… Is it Liv? Or is it the baby? And El is in love with Liv… how does she respond to that bit of information? Will he be able to convince her to go back home and to let him help?**_

_**Want the answers? You know what to do! Let me a review and let me know what you think!**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Disclaimer: SVU and all recognizable characters belong to Dick Wolf.**_

_**A/N: First of all, many, many thanks to my betas who always work hard to find and correct all my mistakes and always do an amazing job! You ladies are awesome! Your friendship is a gift!**_

_**An extra thanks to Cindy, my new friend and new grammar beta, who has graciously joined my already amazing betas!**_

_**Also, thanks to the readers for all the alerts and the reviews! Reviews are priceless, they're like gold for the authors! Please leave me a review and let me know what you think of this chapter! Ok?**_

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Chapter Four

Elliot broke the kiss, slowly pulled back and looked at Olivia with a gentle smile.

She slowly opened her eyes and looked back at him with a stunned expression.

"Liv?" he asked as his smile slowly faded and apprehension took its' place.

"Umm…" she hesitated as she struggled to get her thoughts straight.

"I'm sorry, Liv. I didn't mean to overstep any boundaries."

"No… I uh… I just…" she shook her head, still trying to clear her thoughts. "I need some time."

"I know, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that." He scooted a short distance away from her.

"No…" she spoke suddenly, almost panicked, as she reached for him. "Please don't leave."

"I'm not leaving, honey," he assured her as he moved back over where he had been next to her. "I just wanted to give you some space and not move too fast."

"I just…" She stopped and bit her bottom lip for a moment before continuing. "I love you, too. I think I might even be in love with you too."

A smile spread across Elliot's face.

Olivia smiled slightly. "But right now… I just need some time to figure everything out. Dean turned me upside down… he left… he just walked away. He said he loved me. If he loved me, how could he walk away when I need him most?"

"He's an idiot, Livia." He answered as he wrapped an arm her and gently pulled her to him. "He doesn't deserve you. You are way too good for him and you deserve more than he could ever give you."

She sighed, relaxing into his embrace. "I loved him… or I thought I did, anyways."

"And he broke your heart."

"Yeah."

"You deserve so much better than him, Sweetheart."

"I don't know about that."

"I do." He answered, gently kissing the top of her head.

"I don't understand how he could just walk away."

"He's a jerk." He spoke quietly. "But you are not in this alone."

"I can't ask you to step in and take care of what Dean should be doing." Tears rolled down her cheeks, getting the shoulder of Elliot's shirt wet.

"You didn't ask me." He tightened his grip around her. "I offered, freely, of my own will."

"El…" She spoke softly.

"Liv, honey, I want to. Please. Please let me be here for you. Lean on me, depend on me."

"I already do." She whispered, her voice cracking as she was unable to keep from crying.

"I mean for more than the job." He answered quietly. "Let me help you." He reached over and laid a gentle hand on her small baby bump. "I love you… and I love this baby."

"El… I can't…" She started to protest.

"I know you're not ready to love me back yet, at least not the way I'm talking about." He reassured her quickly. "I understand and it's ok, I promise. And I know you're hesitant to believe me; that's ok too. But I'm going to keep telling you until you believe me. I love you and the baby."

"How can you love us? How can you love this baby?" Without raising her head from his shoulder, her hand dropped down and joined his where it still rested on her stomach. "It's not your baby."

"Liv," his voice was soft and kind. "I know it's not my baby… not biologically anyway. But that doesn't stop me from loving it. This baby is a part of you and for that reason alone, I already adore her… or him."

Olivia reached over and took his hand, threading her fingers through his. "Thank you." She whispered, her voice broken with tears.

"Anything for you." He kissed the top of her head again. "I'll do anything for you."

She slowly blew out a breath. "I know, and I for you."

"Let's get out of here, huh?"

She raised her head and looked over at him, her fingers still laced with his. "Elliot… I don't wanna go home yet."

"I didn't say home." He smiled gently. "I know you're not ready for that. We can go somewhere else."

"Where?"

"Anywhere you want to go."

"Is Cragen mad?" Olivia asked as she watched the sunrise through the thin, cheap hotel curtains.

"Yes." He answered honestly. "But not at you. He's worried about you. All of the guys are worried. And he's beyond furious at Porter."

"At Dean? But Cap doesn't know…"

Elliot shook his head. "It doesn't matter. He knows Porter has something to do with it."

Olivia sighed as yet another fresh wave of tears streamed down her face. "Ok, let's go. Anywhere but home."

~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~EO~~

Less than an hour later, Elliot slipped into the driver's seat of his car and smiled at Olivia.

She smiled sadly then looked nervously out the window at her rental car.

"Don't worry." He assured her, reading her mind. "I left the keys and a nice tip with the desk clerk; she's going to make sure it gets back to the rental company safely and in one piece."

"Thanks." She whispered as he started the car.

"No problem, Baby."

Olivia looked over at him, her eyes questioning.

He winked at her but offered no explanation for the pet name.

She nodded slightly as another sad smile graced her face. She turned and looked out the passenger window as they pulled out of the hotel parking lot and onto the road.

Elliot pulled his cell phone from his shirt pocket. "I need to call Cragen."

She looked back at him quickly, a slight look of panic on her face. "Don't tell him! Please, not yet." Tears pooled in her eyes.

"No. No, honey. I'm not." He dropped his phone on the seat beside him and quickly reached out for her hand. "I just need to tell him that we're not going to be back to work for a few days." He assured her as he wrapped her hand in his own.

"I'm sorry." She whispered as she used her free hand to wipe away her sudden tears.

"It was my fault." He answered as he gently squeezed her hand. "I didn't make it clear what I meant. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

"It's ok, I should have known better. I know you're not like that. I'm just a huge mess."

"That's to be expected, Sweetheart. I'd be worried if you weren't a mess right now." He raised her hand to his lips and kissed it softly before letting go and retrieving his cell phone. "Just give me a minute, ok?"

She nodded and returned her gaze to outside the passenger side window.

Elliot hit a speed dial number and raised his phone to his ear. He watched the road ahead of him as he listened to the rings, waiting on his boss to answer.

"Cragen." Came the quick, anxious, almost harsh answer.

"Hey Cap."

"Did you find her yet?" His voice betrayed him, revealing his nervousness.

"I found her." He reassured the older man.

"Thank God." Cragen breathed a sigh of relief. "Is she ok?"

Elliot glanced over at Olivia before answering. "As ok as can be expected."

"What's going on?"

"I can't say."

"Elliot…" Cragen's tone changed from that of a concerned father to that of his commanding officer.

"I can't, Captain. I just can't. Not yet and it's not my place to tell."

Cragen sighed. "So you know what's wrong?"

"Yes." Elliot answered. "But it's for Liv to tell you… when she's ready."

"Alright." The superior officer reluctantly accepted his response. "Is Liv with you now?"

"Yep, and that's why I'm calling."

"What is it?"

"I just needed to tell you that we're not going to be in for a few days."

"A few days?"

"Yeah." Elliot responded. "We're taking a little break from the city."

"A break?" Cragen questioned.

"Liv needs some time."

"I understand. That's fine. I'm glad you're with her. Take as long as she needs."

"Thanks, Cap."

"Before you hang up," Cragen spoke quickly. "Can I talk to Olivia?"

"Hang on a second." Elliot spoke into the phone before holding it out toward Olivia. He glanced over then quickly returned his eyes to the road ahead of them. "Cap wants to talk to you."

She shook her head. "I can't," she whispered.

Elliot put the phone back to his ear. "She's not ready to talk, Cap."

"That's ok, I just want to tell her something."

He held the phone back out to her. "You don't have to talk, just listen. Captain just wants to tell you something."

Olivia blew out a breath and wiped away a few tears before taking the phone.

"Hey, honey." Cragen's voice was gentle when he heard her breathing. "I know you don't feel like talking and that's ok. Just listen to me, ok?" He was quiet, only for a couple of seconds, then continued when he was sure he had her attention. "I don't know what's wrong; you can tell me that in your own time. I just want you to know that we're here for you, all of us. We love you. We'll support you and help you with whatever the problem is." He paused for another couple of seconds as he heard her sniffle and knew she was crying. "You and Elliot take all the time you need. Cry on his shoulder, let him hold you, scream at him, do whatever you need to do. He won't mind at all. Draw some strength from him."

She sniffled again, trying not to break down in sobs. She was just about to hand the phone back to Elliot when her Captain's gentle voice drew her back again.

"Olivia…" He listened for her breathing and continued once he heard it and knew she was still listening. "I know you already know this even though I've never said it aloud. But I want - no, I **_need _**- I need you to hear me now. Hear me and believe me when I tell you that I love you. You've always been more than just one of my detectives. You're not my daughter biologically, but I've always seen you as just that… my daughter. And I'll do whatever I can for you, whatever you need. I'm here whenever you're ready."

With tears rolling freely down her face, she smiled slightly and nodded as she silently handed the phone back to Elliot.

He took the phone and spoke to their commanding officer once more. "She heard you, Cap. Whatever you said to her… she heard you."

"Good." Cragen cleared his voice to get rid of the sound of the tears that were clogging his throat. "You take care of her, son. You hear me?"

"I hear you. And you know I will."

"Call me in a couple of days, just check in and let me know you guys are ok."

"We will. Talk to you soon."

"Talk to you soon." Cragen repeated before hanging up. He sighed before walking out of his office to talk to Fin and Much who were anxiously waiting at their desks.

Elliot slipped his cell phone back into his pocket then reached across the seat, taking Olivia's hand in his own.

They drove in silence for a few minutes before Olivia cleared her throat. "Where are we going?" she asked softly.

"I don't know." Elliot answered honestly. "We can go wherever you want to go."

She thought for a minute then sighed. "Let's just drive."

"Alright." He squeezed her hand gently. "Wherever we end up, we end up."

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_**A/N 2: Aww, Cragen's such a good boss! **_

_**Like at the end of the last chapter… What's wrong? Is it Liv or the baby?**_

_**Where do Liv and El end up? How long will they be gone? Will Liv accept his love for her and her baby? Will she love him back? And Cragen… will she accept his fatherly love and concern or will she push him away?**_

_**These answers and more, coming up… if you want them. But you gotta let me know! Leave me a review, please? I'd love to hear your thoughts!**_


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